“Only your paranoia of falling prevented you from climbing higher.”
I continue to question the Tarot card that appeared in triplicate. Upon waking, I just knew it was the Queen of Pentacles (though the image I recalled made me think she was the solitary woman standing in her garden of the traditional 9 of Pentacles card). It wasn’t until three days later, while I was looking at the traditional Rider-Waite pictures online, that I realized the Two of Wands card most closely matched my dream-memory.
“Each card notes the phases of … your transformation from wife & mother & career woman … to spiritual being.”
I’m afraid that my actions in the dream — climbing only part-way up the mountain, sliding down through the people in the snow (and across my own significator-type card), and then finding myself crawling through a dark library with others trying to stay out of sight — are negative, and indicate my sub-conscious intent to take the easy way out whenever given a choice.
“Unless you … vanquish your fears & doubts … questions & qualms … you quickly will slide back to your comfort zone.”
I know this dream was a teaching tool, but…
What the heck am I supposed to learn?!
Handily enough, one of my favorite sites posted a Dream Interpretation Spread just a couple days later:
Overall Theme of the Dream: 10. Wheel of Fortune
This seems to be a cycle for me: climbing up, moving down; two steps forward, one step back. While progress is made, it’s slow and often painful. However, there’s always hope because opportunities arise to take those next steps forward, even in the middle of personal crises…
“Only you can break the cycle.”
What is Blocking this Message: 5. The Hierophant
Structure and expectations, either from myself, others, society, the church…
“Go question your faith.”
Message of the Dream: 20. Judgement
It’s true, I’ve been my own harshest judge since this dream. I immediately tried to convince myself that I chose to halt my upward progress and instead slide downhill — disrespectful of the personal, intuitive progress I’ve made over the past year — and down into the shadows… that I expect the worst of myself and that I’m a BAD PERSON. This card also represents the end of a cycle — does it have anything to do with the Wheel of Fortune card?
“[God] pulls us forward despite our harsh judgement of ourselves. … Goodness open[s] Souls to producing higher vibrations … to grow & not slide back.”
I’m currently listening to the archived Beyond Worlds Tarot Tribe intensive class on the Judgement card. One of the hosts described this card as representing “the flame you’re afraid to fly into,” or the unveiling of some major issue that has been buried until now. It’s certainly a call to review your life up to this point, to decide how to proceed from here.
Lesson to be Learned: 10 of Cups
Well, isn’t this a pretty special card? *sigh*
Normally it’s one of the best cards to receive in any spread, symbolizing happy hearth and home, reunion with family and loved ones, enjoying all that life has to offer, being fulfilled, yada yada… Could this indicate that happiness will follow only if I release self-judgement and don’t worry about satisfying society’s expectations?
… and then I wonder if this ties in to my theta healing session and the rediscovery of my inner stability, heightened awareness, growing self-confidence… and the days when I slip on back into my shell… so many questions.
Any other thoughts out there?